adventures in awkward

I’ve never done this before, but instead of being, you know… productive this morning and writing the post I had planned, I ended up spending two hours reading every.single.post I’ve made since I started this blog. That’s almost two years worth. I was going to write about a funny story from my childhood but for the life of me – I couldn’t remember if I’d posted about it before. I’m worried I’m going to start repeating myself and look like a complete idiot. Have you guys gotten to that point yet? My mind has gone to complete crap. Maybe it’s my age or the long term effect of eating too many cheese balls as a kid, but I’m blaming 4/20 even though I haven’t smoked in years. Yep, definitely the weed’s fault.

So, for the first time ever, I’m going to do a ‘Friday Flashback‘ post and share one from over a year ago. It goes along well with the fact that I’ve been feeling a bit down from having a lack of a life/friends lately. (Why is it so hard to make friends as an adult? I never had this issue when I was younger.)


February 2016:

I recently stumbled upon a blogger who was reviewing a local restaurant right down the road from me. It made me pretty excited, so I posted a comment and tried to connect with her. I really had no intention of meeting this person, I just wanted to tell her how much I agreed with her good review and next time she should get the Bacon & Pimento Cheeseburger because it will give her a mouthgasm. (If you don’t know what Pimento cheese is, you’re not living life.)

 

Well… she never responded to me. I figured I might come across a bit crazy in my writing, so I thought reaching out to her in an email would clear my name and make her feel more at ease:

“Hi!

I commented on your post recently and I’m worried I came across weird and freaked you out. Don’t be scared. I didn’t want to meet up with you or anything like that. I know I come across a little crazy on my blog… but I assure you I’m more of a “I made my 8-year-old niece try a dog treat crazy” rather than a “I’m going to find your house and harvest your organs crazy.” Speaking of your house, the one on your Bio page is so cute. So is your dog. If you want to be friends, I’m just down the road.

-Blair”

Pretty sure I made it worse. You win some, you lose some right?

Lesson of the Day : If you want to make new friends off the internet, don’t mention living down the road from them and harvesting their organs in the same paragraph.

PS – I promise… I’m really not crazy! Well, not serial killer crazy at least.

rambles

I’m a failure at social media. Absolutely rotten at it. I used to try to get into it, but, after a few years — I simply didn’t give a crap anymore. I think the problem is I don’t understand it. I couldn’t help but feel like I was doing a disservice to everyone by boring them to tears over the contents of my everyday life. Since I’m sparing y’all from that, I’m just going to say: you’re welcome. Oddly enough, I do enjoy reading people’s posts about their lives. Which doesn’t make me a stalker at all. Right? Right?! Hell… we’re all a bunch of goddamned stalkers. All of us. Such creeps. 

I’ve never  posted anything for Flashback Friday. (I hope that’s a thing. I’m not 100%, but I’m going with it.) I assume FF was made up for the slackers who forgot Throwback Thursday and still want a reason to throw up their old photos of peace signs, perked up duck lips, and awkward selfies. So, let’s get to it…

Here I am. Barely 3 years old. A week before Christmas. The very first photo at the start of my embarrassing addiction. To slippers.3yroldblair

Yep, I love slippers and I’ve received them a week before Christmas for the last 26 years straight. Gotta embrace traditions, you know? Do you have something you get every year without fail? Don’t be embarrassed, now…